Hmmm a couple things I'd like to explore is first when I get confused, I tend to be depressed. Why is that? It might have something to do with my need to be in control. When one is confused, one is dependent on someone to guide them & help them understand. I guess I don't like that. I see it as a sign of weakness, a vulnerable spot to be in. Why can't I just accept confusion? Why can’t I accept the fact that at times I just won't know things-it's ok to be in the dark? The ignorance of a child is a good thing because they are worried about the things they need to be worried about like playing, and stories, and laughing. Just like that child, I should be worried about stuff like spending time with my dad, loving & enjoying others & accepting the seasons with joy & thanksgiving. Being confused & not knowing things is a sign of weakness, vulnerability, and dependency. But who said that is a bad thing anyway? The devil said. He wanted to be his own god- to rule, to know all- to control all. When I get at times in my life where I have this lust for control and knowledge for more than is good for me, I should stop & think whose example I am following- God or the devil.
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